Do NOT Turn Jesus On¹

Now we know what they mean by “Jesus is the light of the world”.

1. Creative Commons http://flickr.com/photos/sepultura/2282088722/ [↩]

Its been about a year since Danish newspapers (and subsequently others around the world) published some cartoons poking fun and the religion of Islam. We all know the story: outcry, censorship, violence, destruction, etc.

This week, many newspapers republished the cartoons (posted below) in response to a foiled attempt to murder the cartoonist¹ . Many people claim that such cartoons are hateful and discriminatory. Check a dictionary (or better yet, the koran). They are merely descriptive.

What’s the difference between description and discrimination? Well, discrimination targets people. You might hate country music, but that doesn’t mean you discriminate against country singers. Similarly, these cartoons are not examples of discrimination, they are comments on the tenets of Islam. They do not advocate harming Muslims or hatred against any Muslim - what a ludicrous conclusion. You do not have a right NOT to be offended.

Or perhaps I have the right to kill anyone that challenges my Atheism, musical taste, or gawky posture. Any religious person that claims I deserve to suffer in hell because my beliefs should be murdered or imprisoned. That is hatred; that is musical non-religious bigotry of the highest order. Welcome to my struggle² .

1. Danish papers republish Prophet cartoon. Reuters UK. 13 February 2008. [↩]
2. English for ‘Jihad‘ [↩]

Scientology Pamphlet¹

Protest the Church of Scientology? Why not.

Anonymous or not, online oganizers decided to change the news, focus on a powerful organization, and show distaste for it. The nice thing about action: you don’t have to worry about libel or hate speech. It’s curious vocalized criticism of doctors, pharmacists, or homosexuals² doesn’t qualify as hatred/discrimination (But thats another issue).

For weeks anonymous videos have been threatening the church and organizing a modern media crusade. Some people went further, sending fake anthrax letters to Churches in Los Angeles³ .

Why you ask?

It definitely isn’t due to fraudulent and criminal activities, secrecy, destructive beliefs or opportunistic emotional brainwashing. So what then? Why the anger?

Maybe people in their 20’s just have nothing better to do with their time. They need some senseless, random, cause. There just aren’t enough causes for concern to keep us occupied. We crave senseless discrimination. We are legion.

I am what? Babling? No. I am fair and balanced - scientific even. I told you the what, but what about the why?

Why not? Get up off your as this Sunday. Forget about your exams, work, mass?, or hangover nursing for a day. Embrace the opportunity. Save your political passivity for Monday. Drop some acid with your MAOI’s and Ritalin while smoking a joint outside Scientology headquarters; just cause that’s your right⁴ . Do what’s right.⁵

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1. Creative Commons http://www.flickr.com/photos/groovymother/527216967/sizes/m/ [↩]
2. Just threw this one out there, not that its necessarily Scientology related [↩]
3. Mailings to Scientology sites probed. L.A. Times. 31 January 2008. [↩]
4. To find a location nearest you click here [↩]
5. Not Wendy’s [↩]

Many people believe that 2000 years ago, a child was born. This child was the offspring of the God of the Old Testament and of a Virgin woman. He was crucified, killed, and resurrected a few days later. All of course, as a plan. The plan was to ‘rescue’ humanity from a single sin, perpetrated by our original ancestors.

Now I will not get into the finer details about this story because quite frankly, I don’t have time. What I would like everyone to keep in mind, is that this story is based on the testimony of individuals who claim to have seen this event or who heard about it (nevermind the delicate controversy about whether or not first-person testimony actually exists). It is on the basis of this testimony, coupled with some very loose ‘logic’, that one third of the human race currently believes this story is true.

Michael Persinger, a Canadian neuroscientist, has conducted experiments which ’simulate’ religious experiences using electro-magnetic waves. He also notes, that a substance called reserpine will elicit a “death-like” state in animals when they are restrained, only to seemingly “resurrect” after about 3 days. The Celts performed similar ceremonies, citing the experience as proof of an afterlife.

Did a Jesus truly rise from the dead and destroy every shred of evidence suggesting its impossibility? Or was it just a performance, acted out by a jewish sect, in hopes of attracting members in a religiously competitive culture? Do you ever wonder why there is not a single eyewitness testimony or historical reference near the date Jesus’ death was supposed to have occurred?

Do you wonder why the earliest gospel was written a minimum of 40 years after the fact? Could this be the most successful Hoax in human history? “No!” you say, “I have experienced the power of Jesus’ resurrection personally”. A visit to your local faith healer will demonstrate the power of suggestion. What happens when an entire culture proposes a particular idea? Did you experience Jesus before you knew about him?

But maybe people are too honest to do such things.

Here’s the relevant clip from Michael’s lecture:

Download ipod version

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In an unprecedented landmark study, researchers at the University of Oxford discover that abstinence programs don’t do anything. Nothing¹ . They don’t prevent HIV, sex, pregnancy, or child molestation. They quite literally have no impact whatsoever - besides that little issue of wasted tax money.

Who would have thought that a program designed to actively discourage genetically programmed biological urges would fail? Whats next? Research suggesting that homosexual cures don’t work?

If something isn’t done soon, government will stop sponsoring religious programs! What the hell am I going to criticize then?

What a pity.

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1. Underhill, K., Montgomery, P., Operaric, D. (August 2007), “Sexual abstinence only programmes to prevent HIV infection in high income countries: systematic review.” British Medical Journal. 335: 248. [↩]

Do you remember reading in school, or seeing in Mel Gibson’s Apocalypto (a vile movie I might add), stories of human sacrifice? People captured, limbs tied; forced to sacrifice their lives in order to appease the gods. Archaic tales of civilizations long forgotten…

Seems we are merely uninformed.

Human sacrifice is happening today: in a little south African country called Mozambique. According to BBC News:

Murder, mutilation and exhuming human bones for witchcraft have become a common practice, particularly in the country’s northern and central regions.

That’s right. People are being murdered so that their body parts can be used for witchcraft spells. This is different than all of those chilling reports of organ harvesting during surgery or for criminal punishment. These are helpless, forgotten, undeserving women and children. I suppose both cases have profit motive in common.

Thankfully politicians are on the job. Mozambican officials are scrambling as we speak, enacting laws against human trafficking for the purpose of selling body parts. Apparently bad press made them change their views on the topic. Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself; democracy of course; maybe parliament is not in agreement. In a couple of weeks, the story may just blow over and they won’t have to strain themselves. Awww… they grow up so fast.

Some of you may think: “God, why aren’t we over there doing something about this?”. Fair question, I suppose. But let me ask you this: Who are we to go barging into some democratic country and forcing our morality? Do Mozambicans come invade us because our priests sexually abuse our children? No, they mind their own business. We should do the same.

The only reason to invade for the sake of ethics is in the case of verbal or political challenges. Ethical responsibility forces us to create an agreeable form of government and show how righteous we are in giving their citizens more rights and freedoms. We will defend our battles to the death, on ethical grounds of course. Brave at heart indeed.

That is why we cannot send troops to Mozambique or Darfur (where women are regularly raped and forced to eat feces while their families watch). We must stand by our ethics and let democracy flourish! If women don’t like being raped or murdered for body parts then they should vote against it, if they can. Jesus, can’t they see we’ve got enough things to deal with?

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500 victims, $650 million: That is the settlement of the most recent sexual abuse lawsuit involving the Los Angeles Catholic Diocese. Gives you a nice feeling of vindication doesn’t it?

Not quite. Its quite unsettling really. Just think… 500 victims have come forward when most victims are believed not to have come forward… only in the district of Los Angeles.

And what has taken all this time you ask? Well according to the Church’s attorney:

“We would have loved to have done this years ago, but it was going to take this case (getting) ready for trial before the insurance companies had satisfied themselves that they had done all they needed to do to protect their own shareholders”

Hold on a minute. The church has insurance for child abuse? I can’t imagine the kinds of premiums they pay for that. And $650 million? How does a single diocese have enough money to pay for that kind of thing? Aren’t religions exempt from taxes because they are supposedly non-profit? Apparently they are selling a few properties, taking out some investments, and taking out a small loan. Luckily the financial burden isn’t big enough to close down any parishes (alter boy brothels?) or parish schools… I guess you can’t deny that they’re always thinking about the children.

I hope Some people don’t feel hesitant now about giving money to a collection plate because of financial difficulties; now you know that the $5 bill you put in that plate is going towards a good cause: Justice.

If you are interested in this topic and would like to learn more about this case in particular, I recommend the documentary “Deliver Us From Evil”. It systematically shows how these reports were covered up and how this process led to promotion in the church. It will make any decent human being sick to their stomach. Trailer and link below:

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A Romanian murder convict began a legal case against God in 2005 that has finally been rejected. Here’s the story:

After two years of debates, Romanian prosecutors stoped the investigations in weird case of “Mircea vs God”.

In 2005, Pavel Mircea, who serve for 20 years in prison for murder, sued God because God didn’t protected him from troubles, as he promised at christening time, and then God left him to Satan, who stimulated him to murder.

Additionally, Mircea accused God of bribery and fraud and asked back the money spent with candles and religious services.

The attorney decided not to begin the criminal investigation versus God.

They argued God doesn’t have a residence where the Prosecutor’s Office can send a subpoena.

Yeah and where the hell is that Porsche he’s been promising me all these years? Not to mention the 2nd coming, salvation, rapture, 3-headed demon, and apocalypse. We’ve even got these in writing! And guy has to be loaded you know, what with 2500 years of church donations… Quick, I need a lawyer!

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