It’s been a while now since i’ve published a piece. I truly miss it. And not from a lack of ideas or material but rather sheer degenerate dead waiting; idle restlessness and procrastination. It is a ghastly sickness that traps you like a tire wedging itself in a pre-paved tread. Find as little resistance as necessary to maintain… But maintain what?

I am not alone. I am the product of my surroundings. Anyone denying the great idle bore, our mindset, is a pretentious beast basking in the aroma of its own feces. The same shit day-in, day-out: speak mind-over-matter, choke occasionally, ingest mounds of thoughtless titilation. For 2500 years we seek reason and perfection as something real and ultimate… nothing but a hollow incarnation of our desire to overcome the beast of desire.

So here we are, locked in the desireless battle between Religion & Science; shouting obscenities at the power-yielding douche dolls of ancient times. Who the fuck cares? Who cares that scumbags and liars exploit brilliance for riches? Who cares that your liberty is taken to empower honestly heinous bastards so that the decievingly wretched actors can protect you from them? To these issues numb your reason with decadent beastiality. Withold your reason for isolation, for the abstract.

I wonder if this bull is anything but dead. Thoughts, ideas, abstractions. I could connect a million dots together and it wouldn’t make a difference. Power only comes when millions of people share my delusion (see taurus in the sky lately?). Until then, all we have is titilating flashes across the screen. “Still humping the American Dream.”¹

But enough of that chin-raised gibberish eh? Some pompous asshole spewing opinions from an armchair. Or is it floor-gazing regret? No matter, what’s important is movement, grounded reality, or something.  Idleness, dead waiting, rebirth. “What’s the point here?” Oh thats right, closure. After some short, meaningless consideration I will end this site… this idea. It is with this suiting title, a clear summary of my writing this last year, that I am bringing this shit to a close. Clearly it is not quite me.  The mind is built up from mostly movement and feeling… start there, think later.

http://www.deadwaiting.com

1. R.I.P. Hunter S. Thompson [↩]

Fetus in a tube¹

So the age of human cloning has begun… A scientist clones himself.

And, as expected, a moral battle has ensued. Its important to understand exactly what is at issue. We are not dealing with the actual birth of any clones - the idea is to use cloning as a means to obtain stem cells for patients suffering from Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s, transplant patients, diabetes sufferers, and many others. It isn’t The 6th Day or The Island people; the embryos only live several days.

But some people panic (surprise!). They think that this akin to breeding for spare parts, playing god, genetic engineering, or a small step towards much more serious experimentation. Richard Doerflinger, a representative of the Catholic Church says,

It does not answer the ethical or social questions about the mass-production of developing human lives in order to destroy them. . . . It only tells us that these questions are more urgent than ever.²

Fortunately for Doerflinger, most science does not make ethical arguments. Nonetheless, nobody is ‘developing human lives in order to destroy them’ - except maybe god.

We are attempting to develop pre-human lives, in order to save actual lives and benefit those around them. Where did this ludicrous idea of associating mysticism to the moment of conception come from anyway? If it wasn’t for the sciences of biology and anatomy, Doerflinger might accuse people of ethical malpractice for building mud sculptures. As far as religious texts are concerned, God is ignorant of fetal development.

And yet, there is something odd about this cloning business isn’t there? Though somehow I doubt it has anything to do with ‘killing’ anything worthy of our moral consideration. Maybe Hollywood did it to us; maybe it’s the danger of a black market; or maybe our prehistoric ego’s can’t accept the fact that each one of us is just a natural, duplicable, machine.

Or what do I know? Maybe there is a divine plan behind rape pregnancies, miscarriages, deformed children, and conjoint twins. But if that’s intelligent design, I’m proud to be a moron.

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1. Creative Commons http://www.flickr.com/photos/thaumata/317263639/ [↩]
2. Mature Human Embryos Created From Adult Skin Cells. Washington Post. 18 January 2008. [↩]

Many people believe that 2000 years ago, a child was born. This child was the offspring of the God of the Old Testament and of a Virgin woman. He was crucified, killed, and resurrected a few days later. All of course, as a plan. The plan was to ‘rescue’ humanity from a single sin, perpetrated by our original ancestors.

Now I will not get into the finer details about this story because quite frankly, I don’t have time. What I would like everyone to keep in mind, is that this story is based on the testimony of individuals who claim to have seen this event or who heard about it (nevermind the delicate controversy about whether or not first-person testimony actually exists). It is on the basis of this testimony, coupled with some very loose ‘logic’, that one third of the human race currently believes this story is true.

Michael Persinger, a Canadian neuroscientist, has conducted experiments which ’simulate’ religious experiences using electro-magnetic waves. He also notes, that a substance called reserpine will elicit a “death-like” state in animals when they are restrained, only to seemingly “resurrect” after about 3 days. The Celts performed similar ceremonies, citing the experience as proof of an afterlife.

Did a Jesus truly rise from the dead and destroy every shred of evidence suggesting its impossibility? Or was it just a performance, acted out by a jewish sect, in hopes of attracting members in a religiously competitive culture? Do you ever wonder why there is not a single eyewitness testimony or historical reference near the date Jesus’ death was supposed to have occurred?

Do you wonder why the earliest gospel was written a minimum of 40 years after the fact? Could this be the most successful Hoax in human history? “No!” you say, “I have experienced the power of Jesus’ resurrection personally”. A visit to your local faith healer will demonstrate the power of suggestion. What happens when an entire culture proposes a particular idea? Did you experience Jesus before you knew about him?

But maybe people are too honest to do such things.

Here’s the relevant clip from Michael’s lecture:

Download ipod version

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Back Alley on East Hastings, Vancouver¹

Main and Hastings, Vancouver, Canada: A dessert of dirt, garbage, and the concrete dust remains of human misery. A country within a country; block after block of dull washed away brick, chapels, bent shopping carts, ‘truly’ free markets, and relief societies. Here, sleeps the soul of Canada’s tropical paradise; a wasteland of death behind the mirage of salvation. Needle-by-needle, theft-after-theft, the dust storms pick up speed.

A short, balding woman, covered in dust, paces up and down the trash-riddled alley. She glares me in the eyes, fidgets uncontrollably, and fixes a manikin-like gaze near my shoes. I take three steps to the left. She…takes one forward, hunching near the pavement. Three more to the left. Then, before I can glance back, she is crouched in the corner behind me. Another takes notice. It speeds towards her in a drunken vampire frenzy. They share. Before it is time for me to leave, deja vu. Both creatures are pacing up and down that very same street; I’d swear it was the matrix, but they aren’t trembling anymore.

Where do you find hope in the midst of a hell like this? Perhaps a tiny place called Insite: North America’s only safe injection facility. For those of you unaware of this facility, it stands as a safe haven in Vancouver’s worst area. It provides clean syringes, keeps medical staff on hand, saves hundreds of lives, prevents the spread of HIV and Hepatitis, lowers public drug usage, and reduces sidewalk needle disposal. Violence, theft, and drug use have remained stable. But perhaps most damaging of all: many addicts have pursued successful addiction treatment through the facility - possibly using health care funds.

Now, for reasons I’m sure must be related to health care, Insite is under attack.

Read more

1. http://www.flickr.com/photos/stollerdos/143573967/ [↩]

In an unprecedented landmark study, researchers at the University of Oxford discover that abstinence programs don’t do anything. Nothing¹ . They don’t prevent HIV, sex, pregnancy, or child molestation. They quite literally have no impact whatsoever - besides that little issue of wasted tax money.

Who would have thought that a program designed to actively discourage genetically programmed biological urges would fail? Whats next? Research suggesting that homosexual cures don’t work?

If something isn’t done soon, government will stop sponsoring religious programs! What the hell am I going to criticize then?

What a pity.

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1. Underhill, K., Montgomery, P., Operaric, D. (August 2007), “Sexual abstinence only programmes to prevent HIV infection in high income countries: systematic review.” British Medical Journal. 335: 248. [↩]

Lets all try to wrap our brains around this one.

I noticed today, in my neglected inbox of mostly dry, horrendously boring science news that something seemed a little ‘off’ about this story. Apparently, researchers at the University at Buffalo have linked the use of malt liquor (your Big Bear, Colt 45, Olde English 800, Magnum, Bull Ice, etc.) to marijuana and other substance abuse among young adults.¹ . In fact, regular users of malt liquor were found to consume an average of 19 joints per week as opposed to an average of 2. And no, marijuana use was not the factor contributing to drinking as most of the participants consumed malt liquor before ever trying marijuana. Scary isn’t it?

Now if we believe in all of the ummm… arguments in favor of criminalizing marijuana (ie. cancer, gateway to heroine, psychosis, stupidity, crime, etc.) including that flawless study I mentioned last time, then this study should be truly revolutionary right? The majority of research suggests that the more marijuana you use, the higher your risk of acquiring one of those horrifying side-effects. Last time I mentioned that heavy marijuana consumption could double your risk of developing schizophrenia! So, by the laws of reason: drinking malt liquor leads to heavy marijuana use and heavy marijuana use leads to dangerous side-effects, therefore… Malt liquor should be easily available and its advertising targeted at young adults.

Sound about right?

Indeed, the famous ‘gateway’ theory of marijuana (ie. if you smoke dope, you’ll probably smoke crack eventually) is of extreme importance here. Yes, many abusers of drugs such as cocaine, heroine, meth, etc. had experience with marijuana first. What is rarely ever mentioned, in the frenzy of major media regurgitating political jargon, is that this ‘gateway’ sequence is almost always started with alcohol or cigarettes - then followed by marijuana² . Why wouldn’t they mention it you ask? Maybe its laziness or stupidity even; most likely they don’t want to get shit on by Budweiser while they’re kissing its gigantic advertising-budget ass.

Luckily there is a silver lining in this twisted shamble of bureaucratic bullshit. Oh yes, perhaps things are not as bad as they immediately appear. Some evidence suggests that marijuana can be used as a treatment for alcohol abuse³ . Not only that, marijuana consumption has been linked with lower alcohol consumption as compared with non-marijuana smokers in Jamaica, where marijuana is often considered accepted⁴ .

So lets let teenage children drink malt liquor. If they do, there is a better chance that they will develop into heavy marijuana smokers. By doing so, they will be less likely to develop into heavy drinkers and may even kick that drinking habit all together. Thus saving thousands of lives every year! In fact, we should start selling Colt 45 in elementary cafeterias for christ’s sake… the earlier the better.

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1. Bradiaza, C. M., Collins, R. L., Vincent, P. C. (June 2007), “Young-Adult Malt Liquor Drinkers : Prediction of Alcohol Problems and Marijuana Use.” Psychology of Addictive Behaviors. 28(2): 138-146. [↩]
2. U.S. Congress, Office of Technology Assessment (19940 Technologies for Understanding and Preventing Substance Abuse and Addiction, OTA-EHR-597 (Washington, DC: U.S. Government Printing Office, September 1994). pg. 74. [↩]
3. Mikuriya, T. D. (April 1970), “An adjunctive therapeutic tool in the treatment of alcoholism.” Medical Times. 98(4): 187-191. [↩]
4. Rubin, V., Comitas, L. (1975), “Ganja in Jamaica: a Medical Anthropological Study of Chronic Marihuana Use“. [↩]

You’ve heard it for years now: marijuana makes you insane. This myth has been floating around from the 30’s government propaganda publicizing that one puff of a joint could make you a murderer, to the modern notion that marijuana use may cause schizophrenia. Despite countless studies advocating tolerance, legalization, and the relative harmlessness of marijuana as compared to other substances, once in a while you find a study that pushes back. It is these fringe ’scientific’ articles that politicians seize hold of while jabbering on about increased potency, witch-hunt-like tales of smoke-induced spells, crime, and mental disorder. Aha! they say. Behold! The demon is real.

Recently The Lancet published one such article summarizing evidence that marijuana increases ones risk of developing schizophrenia.¹ They found that occasional use will increase the risk of schizophrenia by 40% and heavy use will increase risk by 50-200%. The authors claim that their results are nearly free of bias and confounds, but the summary was based on only 7 studies. These were judged by the researchers to be the “relevant” ones out of over 4800. The study admits that many of the articles they used did not make adjustments for alcohol use, mental health disorders, and most were unlikely to adjust confound statistics for all mental health symptoms. It is quite likely that those predisposed with a biological risk for schizophrenia have personality traits that make them more likely to engage in marijuana consumption.

To further complicate matters, it is unclear whether ‘psychotic’ symptoms reported during much of the research was due to intoxication or due to schizophrenia itself. So…they might not have been schizophrenic, just high. If thats not enough, of the 7 summarized research articles, 50 possible confounds were identified. Thats right 50. In other words, there were 50 other potential causes for the increased risk of developing schizophrenia that may have compromised the results. And while we’re on the topic of confounds: nearly all contributors to the study are admittedly on the payroll of large pharmaceutical companies such as Bristol Myers Squibb, Johnson & Johnson, and/or Merck. Some are even paid to investigate marijuana compounds for these companies. Companies which, to my knowledge, are not developing marijuana-derived medication of any kind, but who may be threatened should medical marijuana be made available on a large scale. Sounds like pretty definitive research doesn’t it?

There is no doubt in my mind that this type of research will be used to advocate the continued ban on marijuana. So despite the fact that less that 3% of the population is at risk of schizophrenia, that marijuana only marginally increases this risk, and that the research supporting it is questionable at best - the rhetoric is always the same: Marijuana causes insanity. I can see it already… spin doctors estimating the number of suicides attributed to marijuana based on this assessment, medical marijuana benefits trumped by the potential for psychosis in court, and fear mongering ads citing this garbage across our airwaves. Thank God for science.

If this doesn’t sound ridiculous enough for you, maybe some numbers will help. In the U.S., between 1979 and 1998: 380,000 people died from alcohol-induced incidents (over 7000 from alcohol-related psychosis ), 30,000 choked to death on food, 24,000 died falling down steps, 10,000 slipped or tripped to their death, 8,000 were accidentally poisoned to death by car exhaust, 4,000 died by accidentally lighting their clothes on fire, 1,000 were killed by bees, 200 died from sniffing glue, 65 died in sports tackles, and 33 accidentally fell to their death in a manhole.² And how many died from marijuana?

23… Just above flatulence and gas pain.

It should also be mentioned that many marijuana-induced deaths involve car accidents where another substance was abused at the same time; probably knocking it down below gas pain as a cause of death. By the way, the number of recorded human history deaths related to marijuana overdose is still running at an astonishing benchmark of 0.

But who knows! Maybe marijuana does make you crazy. Maybe its worth it to spend billions of dollars catching, incarcerating, and punishing smokers for the rest of their lives. We don’t need those hundreds of billions of our tax dollars or the hundreds of billions that could be raised by taxing marijuana. Worthless really. Health care is as good as ever, mental illness is on the decline, economy is strong, education is cheaper than ever, and our society is in pristine shape. I mean, every rich bastard needs something to blow his or her money on don’t they? We like drugs. Buying the expensive ones - baning the natural ones.

A Brave New World indeed.

I’ll leave you with one of the most historically accurate marijuana documentaries of all time to digest for now. Government sponsored of course. Oh the Reefer Madness!

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1. Barnes, T., et al. (July 2007), “Cannabis use and risk of psychotic or affective mental health outcomes: a systematic review.” The Lancet. 370: 319-328. [↩]
2. Centers For Disease Control and Prevention [↩]

If you watch news, read a paper, or even walk by a news stand then you’ve probably heard: Ipods can kill you.

Well I suppose that is a bit of an exaggeration. Truth is that the earphones, all earphones in fact, may channel the electricity of a lighting strike into your brain if you happen to get struck. Can you believe it? After only 87 years of headphone usage, we already have a case of this modern device endangering our lifestyles! So for all you thunderstorm joggers that hide under trees when the storm gets rough and neglect to remove your headphones… Beware! You may be at risk.

I guess it makes sense that this story got worldwide news coverage and front page status. A quick search on google news popped up over 500 stories. Many news agencies had the headline on the front page of their print editions, and soon television networks jumped on the fear parade as well.

With all of the overhyped terrorism, murder, theft, rape, and many other issues that require your attention, its a good thing that our news providers help us focus on the real dangers.

Negative advertising you say? No such thing.

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